Fleeting moments

slipping

He stood at the bus stop, waiting for the bus that would take him home. He casually watched the people that were sitting and standing around him, wondering who they were and how their life had brought them there to that bus stop. It was then, as he looked around passing his time in random thought, that he saw her.

Only, he had not seen her… He had seen her face in a stranger that resembled her in hairstyle and physique. A stranger that could have easily been her, apart from the simple fact that she wasn’t.

Again he found that he had, for a brief moment, allowed himself to get excited, allowed himself to hope as he had done so many times before. It had happened yet again. He no longer thought about her except on occasions such as this, occasions where a glimpse would trigger his sub conscious and unlock a memory from deep within his psyche.

He closed his eyes and succumbed to the memories that surfaced. Suddenly he could, once more, smell the sweet scent of her skin when he held her close.

He could, once more, feel the soft touch of her caress against his cheek.

He could, once more, wonder at the beauty of the eyes that gazed so happily into his.

And finally he could, once more, feel the pain deep within his soul as he watched her leave his life forever.

He had always know that they could never be. He knew that the extent of their companionship would be but a series of memories. fleeting moments, and nothing more. He had come to accept it and felt relief in the knowledge that, sometimes, those moments are enough.

He smiled to himself at the knowledge that destiny had fated them to never meet again and he wondered when he would see her next, not in person, but in a stranger that walked past him in the street.

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Pour ma dame en rose

Si seulement je pouvais vous dire

tout ce que je voulais dire:

Je voudrais vous dire que je veux me perdre dans vos yeux

qui brillent comme la lune sur l’oceon

Que j’ai envie de sentir tes levres parfaites

donnez-moi le baiser parfait

Et que je donnerais mille couchers de soleil

juste pour voir votre sourire

Je voudrais vous dire que vous etes mon ange, mon seul…mon tout

The precipice

He stood there, rocking slightly as he braced himself against the wind that was blowing hard into his face. A stone loosened itself from beneath his foot and fell….down, down, down the cliff face, on the precipice of which he stood. He watched it, the stone, as it fell and continued to watch it as it plummeted towards the rocky river bed hundreds of feet below. He counted the seconds until its size rendered it invisible from such a height, though he thought he could hear a faint click a few seconds later, as it landed with a clash on the rocks below.

We stand upon the brink of a precipice. We peer into the abyss — we grow sick and dizzy. Our first impulse is to shrink from the danger. Unaccountably we remain. By slow degrees our sickness, and dizziness, and horror, become merged in a cloud of unnameable feeling. By gradations, still more imperceptible, this cloud assumes shape, as did the vapor from the bottle out of which arose the genius in the Arabian Nights. But out of this our cloud upon the precipice’s edge, there grows into palpability, a shape, far more terrible than any genius, or any demon of a tale, and yet it is but a thought, although a fearful one, and one which chills the very marrow of our bones with the fierceness of the delight of its horror. It is merely the idea of what would be our sensations during the sweeping precipitancy of a fall from such a height. ~ Edgar Allen Poe

He wondered, as he stood there balancing on the brittle edge between life and death, how it would feel to take that fateful step forward. He imagined it. Imagined closing his eyes and allowing himself to sail through the air, not watching the end as it came towards him as fast as it surely would. He imagined enjoying the sensation of flight in his descent and it continuing for an eternity, for at such a height there would almost certainly be no feeling. One would simply transition from this life into the next.

…The next? He contemplated, even though he didn’t believe in heaven or hell, if there was indeed a life beyond this one. He thought about the words of religious people promising damnation upon those who end their own life, an eternity burning in the fires of hell. He didn’t believe all that.

He opened his eyes once more and took in the scenery that surrounded him. The mountains, proud and majestic as they stood bathed in the warm golden glow cast upon them by the setting sun. The great river below snaking its way through the valley, transforming itself from the epitome of serenity into a wild raging animal frothing at the mouth as it tore over the rapids below. Even from such a height he could hear her mighty roar as it carried on the wind. He inhaled all of it, the sights, the smells, the sounds, and with a smile he closed his eyes for the last time as he let himself fall.

Time slowed as he fell. The seconds seemingly lasting an eternity as he plummeted through the air in free fall, with his arms spread wide about him. Finally opening his eyes, he reached across his chest, pulled the cord and howled with ecstatic joy as he revelled in the adrenaline filled high which only B.A.S.E jumping could provide him.

Freefly-BASE-jump-in-Norway-Red-Bull-Soul-Flyers

The other side.

In my dreams i’m running. I’m running and I have no idea where. No idea what it is that is chasing me. All I know is that I am consumed by fear, and I cannot, will not look back. To look back would be to die. Fear floods my veins with adrenaline. Everything slows down. I feel my heart. I hear it beating in my ears…ba-boom…….ba-boom…….ba-boom. Everything turns to slow motion. I am not ready to die this day.

Everything is white. I stand in a building facing a labyrinth of corridors. Finally I turn. There is a darkness encroaching upon me. I must not let myself be consumed by it. I run, but I have no direction. No way of knowing if I am following the right corridor. The corridors are lined with doors. I try one. Locked. I try another. Locked.

The darkness is approaching faster now. gaining on me. I’m tiring. Almost at my limit, I am ready to give up, give in and accept my fate. Suddenly I hear a voice, and another. Still running , I look around to see where they are coming from. They seem distant, fading, like whispers carried on the wind, distorted through weeps and sobs…. ” Don’t leave us.” ” Fight, I know you can do it.”

Those voices, I know those…..” NAT!” I yell out to them….”NAT, MOM, DAD….WHERE ARE YOU?”

“Nick…..”

“please don’t leave us….”

” We can’t…..let you go…”

” MOM…..NAT…..DAD…. WHERE ARE YOU GUYS??” I turn into yet another corridor.

I’m faced with a junction… ” Left or right?” I battle. ” LEFT OR RIGHT?”

“DECIDE OR DIE!” I close my eyes and grasp the golden key tied around my neck. ” This is the key that will free you.” ” You will know on which door to use it when the time comes….. If you make it.” She had had a kind smile, but there was despair in her eyes as she whispered those words in my ear. She vanished, leaving me only with the key and a host of unanswered questions.

“Nick…..” A whisper floated on the air.

“I’m coming….I’M COMING!” I tear down the right hand tunnel with all that remains of my depleted energy.

I had almost missed it as I ran past. The gleam of golden light from beneath the door has just caught the corner of my eye. By the time I had realised, I was already twenty paces past the door. I turned.

The black oblivion had devoured all and was quickly clawing it’s way towards me…towards the door…my door. I was stuck, for a moment, stuck in horror at my own stupidity. In my haste and desperation I had missed it. My feet were glued to the floor. I dropped to my knees.

This was it.

I was going to die.

I closed my eyes and a reel of images flooded my mind. Memories, of the people I loved most in the world. We were at our favourite vacation spot. Everyone was talking and laughing happily. I could feel the tears streaming down my face, then the images disappeared.

Suddenly i’m up and running back towards the door, as though i’m not in control of my body. The key is in my hand, the links of the chain that held it clinking as the fall to the floor in my wake. I slide the key into the keyhole. I turn the key, but before I am able to push the door open the tidal wave of darkness crashes over me.

“I’m sorry.”

I begin to fall into darkness, falling away  from the golden sliver of light from beneath the door leading to my salvation.

“I’m so sorry.”

I close my eyes in acceptance of my fate. I let myself fall. No longer reaching out for the increasingly distant light of hope from beneath the door. I let myself go.

“Nick?” I hear my sister’s voice.

“Mom, Dad, come quick….something is happening!” There is hope in her voice. She always was the positive one. I wish i could say goodbye.

“Nick?”…. the voice is getting louder

A golden light fills my eyelids. I open my eyes to see the door, my door, is open and the soft golden light is carrying me towards it, towards the voices….towards my family.

“Nick!” My sister’s voice clear as I reach the threshold.

I emerge into a room, A hospital room. My family smiling over me with tears in their eyes as I awake from my coma.

Written for today’s Daily Prompt – Golden key

You’ve been given a key that can open one building, room, locker, or box to which you don’t normally have access. How do you use it, and why?

Her eyes

A world without colour

Now could you imagine that,

A world where all that we see

Are in hues of white and black.

 

Could you find it possible

To live in monotone colour,

A tedious life with no difference

Between one and the other.

 

I can think of but one thing

Wait make that two,

That in a world void of colour

Without which I simply could not do.

 

A pair of eyes I confess

without a shadow of a doubt,

Belonging to my love

Whom I could never be without.

 

So strip my world of all colour

But spare me just one hue,

In her eyes I pray

You will leave her deep ocean blue.

 

Read what other colours people would keep in a world stripped of colour at the daily prompt here : http://dailypost.wordpress.com/dp_prompt/local-color/

That speechless moment

Today’s daily prompt Curve Balls says:

When was the last time you were completely stumped by a question, a request, or a situation you found yourself in? How did you handle it?

This was the moment that came to my mind :

There we were at the bar. I was sitting talking with another girl, when you walked up with two shots of tequila. You told me that you loved tequila and I told you that you were my new favorite person. I loved tequila too, and no one would drink with me because they couldn’t keep up the pace. You, however, weren’t afraid to go the distance.

So it was with the taste of tequila in our mouths that we headed for the bar. We stood, we talked, we drank, we laughed, we joked with the barman and we drank some more.

You bought a round of shots for you and I. I made to kiss you on the cheek, a gesture to say thank you.  You turned your head and you pressed your beautiful soft lips to mine…. We stood for a second, we smiled, then we drank, we joked with the barman and we drank some more.

That speechless moment, that first kiss, will be forever my fondest memory of you…

 

 

That sinking feeling

locked out

It has happened to us all, some of us ( yes, myself included ) more than once. We’ve all experienced that sinking feeling, that dread, as we desperately search or bags or pockets for that which we know is not there….the house keys. ( cue the half sigh half laugh as you remember when it happened to you )

The one question that simply must be asked is: why is it that you realize you’ve locked your keys in the house at the exact moment the lock clicks behind you? It is as though, in that click, you hear life and the lock laughing at you ” Ha ha you just locked yourself out. ” In that whiny, childish mocking voice.

In that moment you cringe, tensing up as you close your eyes, fishing through your pockets, praying that it is not true. Then it dawns on you….it is true. You are an idiot!

It is hereafter that you go through the three stages of being locked out:

 

Stage 1: Desperation

We frantically search for a window that we might have forgotten to close or left slightly open. Desperately tugging at any opening that we manage to squeeze our fingertips into. We climb fences, walk over the roof to jump into the backyard in search of that one window. That one loose window that you always thought would be so easily opened, which is now, when you were really depending on it’s weakness, is completely and absolutely shut tight! It is like a figurative slap in the face, before you literally give yourself a slap in the face for being so daft.

slap yourself

A desperation so intense that it leads you to even try the door, pushing it as though it will just say “okay” and open up for you. Trying saying ” open sesame ” while you are at it.

open sesame

Our futile attempts and failure thereby lead us into stage 2…

 

Stage 2: Anger

Anger at everyone and everything. Remember that window? Yep, you get angry at that notoriously unreliable lock on that window, which has now decided, for some fucking reason… to be reliable, when you most need it to be… unreliable…. How unreliable!! Fucking window!

You get angry at whoever that person is that you were supposed to meet, because if they had not decided to meet up, you would not have left the house…and would not, as you are currently, be locked out.

Angry at your boss for giving you an early shift. If you weren’t still half asleep, you wouldn’t have forgotten your head in bed, and the keys in the house!

Then you will be angry that no one thought about putting a spare somewhere in case of a situation such as this…. because it is not at all dangerous to leave a spare key lying around in this day and age. Not dangerous at all. ( please read sarcasm here, because if you are not….I worry for you. )

We shed the blame on everyone and everything but ourselves, because that would require us to admit that we are, to put it quite simply; a dumb-ass.

your fault

 

Which leads us finally to stage 3….

 

Stage 3: Acceptance

fort knox

Finally, after much cursing and sweating, you have to accept that you do not have a hope in hell of getting into your house. Accept that your house, in the very moment that you closed that door, became Fort Knox and short of strapping explosives to the door and blowing it off it’s hinges, you have no way to get back in.

blowing door

You accept that you actually have no reasonable grounds for blaming anyone or anything but yourself for this awful predicament.

You accept the simple fact…..You are truly, an idiot of epic proportions!

Congratulations!!

idiot